When asked: “What is Your Identity“, people generally answer with a name or some family, religious or ethnic background. Some people don’t even have an answer and I must admit, I haven’t had an answer for this for many years. Could this be because I haven’t asked myself the question? My lifestyle is determined by my identity. It controls my mindset and governs my success. Why is this so? What is identity really?
” If you want to see your past, look at your current results. If you want to see you future, look at your current actions ” – old Chinese proverb.
Identity is the word you say after “I am”
Your actions are shaping your future. Likewise your identity is what you say it is. It’s what you tell yourself it is and it is what you tell others about yourself. Many people undermine their own identity by saying derogatory or dis-empowering things about themselves, such as:
- I am a procrastinator
- I can’t afford that
- I am always unlucky
- I can’t do that
- I am unsuccessful
- and so on.
Even worse, some people lower themselves to saying these things about others… but atleast that doesn’t shape your identity, unless you choose to accept their judgement or perception of YOUR identity.
Imagine the effect this has on your self esteem. It undermines the identity of the person verbalising it. The word you say after “I AM” is your identity. Your identity is what you are. And… your identity will shape your future. Do you want good things for your future or bad things? Saying empowering things about yourself (your identity) will shape you into having good results. The opposite applies to saying dis-empowering things. If other people say bad things about you, that’s not so bad. Only if you accept it. Your own words are the truth to you. They can and will have a lasing effect on your identity. Therefore we need to give our self esteem a boost. Be nice to yourself. Say good things!
An Empowered Identity
So why not Empower your Identity? Say good things. Do you know any super successful people that put themselves down? I don’t think so. They believe in themselves. They are in their current place of success because their identity is strong. It’s strong because they told themselves so, in the past. The things they tell themselves now is building their future and I bet it is an even more successful one.
So say empowering things to yourself. Say after me.
- I am an achiever
- I can afford that
- I am lucky
- I can do that
- I am succesful
Add a few if you like. The list goes on…
- I am helpful
- I am grateful
- I am loving
- I am…
You are in your current place because of your past actions. Your future is shaped by your current actions.
These are things I consider as a success communicator. For me to have success, I need to believe in myself. I say nice things about myself and it feels good. Try it!
Here’s to a strong positive identity and the good things that come with it.
Sean Rasmussen
Success Communicator
SeanRasmussen.com 2004 – 2007
{ 30 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you for the download of your e-book Mindset Mastery.
It is a very good interpretation of Think and Grow Rich and is easier to understand than the original.
Is it possible to buy this as an actual printed book?
I would love to have a printed version for my library as I’m currently learning to trade e-minis and the mind plays a large part in the learning process.
Regards
John Geary
Hi John. Thank you! Napoleon Hill was an innovator and is an inspiration. I have no doubt that great motivators like Tony Robbins, Jim Rohn etc are to a large degree influenced by Napoleon Hill. His work has been groundbreaking. You only have to look at “The Secret” teachers. Although they based their story on Wallace Wattles, Napoleon Hill has a big place in their teachings. Full credit to Wallace Wattles, still.
Ooooh Sean you are just good men thanks a lot now I know better things to say to myself I AM AN ACHIEVER, I AM SUCCESSFUL, I AM HELPFU, GRATEFUL; men i can’t count them all but i pray for more understanding. KINGSLEY.
You’re welcome, Kingsley. The happier you are, the happier I get
I don’t have any doubt that how we define ourselves is a powerful thing. The most common ‘identity’ question I tend to come across is ‘What do you do?’ This is possibly because it is a great icebreaker when meeting people.
Now this question can be interpreted many different ways, but most of the people I come across take this as an opportunity to explain their job. Fair enough in some respects, given that full time in the workforce takes up a fair chunk of a person’s waking hours. So to a certain extent even asking this question invites a response which will define an individual by their occupation.
A better question I heard one day was ‘What is your story?’ While a lot of people I have asked this question of start talking about their employment, some people give really interesting answers which can open up some incredible conversations. More importantly, it is an open ended question that invites the person to define themselves, rather than just listing their occupation.
Now whenever I get ask ‘what do you do?’ I prefer to give a more abstract answer than just saying where I work. If I were to describe my work to someone outside my profession, I’d say something like ‘I give people advice to help them avoid problems’. I also like list a whole bunch of things I do outside of work. I think that this makes for a more interesting response, plus it gives me greater scope to define who I am.
Tom McEwin´s last blog ..Getting Targeted Internet Traffic and a Hungry Crowd
Well done Tom. It’s great that you don’t try to categorise yourself and allow others to make preconcieved judgements about who you really are. I love the abstract responses. I also use the “what’s your story” opener when I meet new people. Open ended questions generate a far better opportunity to really get to know someone.
Hypnotists use this identity thing to create change. It is un-sanity to say I am (anything). It is a linguistic error. Hypnotists use linguistic errors to create confusion and out of confusion comes change. So yes, if we say I am (anything), make that anything positive because we are hypnotizing ourselves into believing we are that anything.
Wal Heinrich´s last blog ..Internet Marketing Why? How?
Hi Sean,
I love this post. You’re right, we need to be so careful with the way we see ourselves. The words and thoughts and feelings that we have about ourselves will dictate how we behave. It’s our behaviors that will create our lives.
We definitely act based on how we see ourselves. It’s a good time to learn some new words to describe ourselves and create some new beliefs. We do need to be a little kinder to ourselves. After all, it’s unlikely that we’d ever talk to a friend the way we talk to ourselves.
Before I went to Tenpin Bowling this morning I was saying things like * I am an achiever I can do that I am successful, I am going to bowl well
my average was 131 I kept the image of all the pins falling each time well I started with first game 160 second 199 third 158 I am so stoked I contribute it to the power of positive thinking
Hi Rita,
I’m working on being more positive and seeing the outcome I want in my mind while I’m doing stuff too. I think this is how we get better; by starting with small things like ten pin bowling and when we get good; then we can move on to more impressive stuff. You did great at bowling. I definitely think it was due to your positive thinking.
Hi Jazz
I did it again this week and my average has gone up by 6 positive thinking and believing I can do well really does help.
I found myself nodding right throughout this post.
I have made massive changes with myself in this department – and with others as well.
To illustrate I have to do a tiny bit of the opposite. Where I currently work as a temp (until Freedom Friday, in 2 days) has a chronic problem in this department. I keep my ears & mouth closed & decided to only find the good in everyone. But I was sooo shocked at the amount of communication between people is so over the top nice & then when they are not in the room the most derogatory language that occurred was phenomenal. From the top managers down!!!! Bad culture… and sends the wrong messages!!
My lesson is to surround myself with people who will love & support me. And to always give love, be grateful for others & myself. What I say & do comes only from the highest source!
Love & peace to you all
Samantha Banfield´s last blog ..Sean Rasmussen and his crazy talk!
Changing how I see myself is a trait I am trying to develop. I usually concentrate on how other people see me. That has to change. Your posts are inspiring me on to greater things
Gee´s last blog ..Why You Should Just Ignore Fad Diets (Part 2)
Hi Gee,
If you usually concentrate on how other people see you, then maybe you will accept my perception of you. I think you are a very kind and considerate man. You are the first one to jump in and help anyone without expecting anything in return. Your advice is always right on the money. You go out of your way to help people. I think you’re wonderful.
here, here, Jazz.
Jo Carey-Bradshaw´s last blog ..Empowering Mindset – Mindfulness
Gee – I used to be so focussed on how other people see me and I can tell you from personal experience only serves to give power to others & does not empower yourself – therefore you are never happy!!
My purpose is to be happy & at peace with who I am. It has taken me 34 years to get that – now, I accept myself for the wacky person I am. It’s those qualities that will attract others – it’s my gift to the world. And the circle of love continues. Because I accpet myself, I accept others for who they are.
I am right there with you Samantha, my change has taken some 60 years and it is very empowering to accept Me for who I am.
Hi Samantha,
I think 34 years is not too bad, considering some people will never get there. From all I know you are a great, funny and fun loving person – which is a great gift, as there is still not enough fun and laughter in our world.
So – congratulations for accepting you the way you are, I like everything I know about you so far
Renee´s last blog ..The Best Way To Get Motivated
Hello Sean,
Its really funny to be saying those things to myself “I am…..” I always think of empowering terms for others when I meet them – “Gosh, they were nice”, “Wow, that was great to meet someone so powerful” etc but never thought to change that around to put onto the other shoe ie my shoe!! I am…..I am going to be thinking of nice words to say about myself so that I have an empowered Identiy.
Another great lesson learnt.
Cheers
Lisa
Lisa Wood´s last blog ..Married 15 Years
An empowered identity is one that does not allow outside forces to define who they are, what they do and how they live their lives.
Oh boy-o… I am getting that here – in my new freakin’ temp role!!! The universe is kicking me up the backside telling me to get empowered. How much pressure do I need before I get my arse into gear & move FAST-LY into what I want.
I can tell you Sam that I have definitely been in the same situation as you. So much so that the affects on me were getting to be severe.
It is funny how things work out and I believe that by taking action we can initiate a catalyst for change within us.
Cemil´s last blog ..Following a Entrepreneurs Mindset
Hi Sean,
great post – somehow I still discover new things on your blog and it seems to always get better
We so often say “I am ….” with a negative note, I will make sure I make a daily statement with a positive ending. Thanks for your suggestions, I will be shaping my identity the way I want!
Renee´s last blog ..The Best Way To Get Motivated
Hi Sean and All,
Wow! a great read. The comments by everyone is as entertaining and as much a learning opportunity as the original article posted by Sean.
I am also someone who can be my own worst critic and also can take on negativity put out by others. I am so lucky I have a couple of good friends who will tell how good I am and it’s usually when I really need it. I love Rita’s positive results and will most definitely adopt this attitude towards myself including positive hints from everyone. This is an empowering article.
Thanks Sean and all comments made here.
Jill Brown´s last blog ..Common Law Marriage – What is Common Law Marriage?
Hey Sean,
Saying empowering comments is like positive affirmations, right? From what I’ve read over the years, the power of these self-statements comes not from the words, but from the belief behind the words. Otherwise wouldn’t it be a case of being on a fine line between being positive in outlook and being delusional? And how can you build that belief when your surrounds and current circumstances don’t reflect the ‘empowerment’ you are saying to yourself?
I don’t mean to bring down the tone and darken everyone’s positive vibe. I’m someone that is a ‘How do’ kind of fella. I like to know ‘how do’ you do it (or more so, ‘why do’ you do it) so that I have a better understanding of the application and the process. Or could that be part of my problem and that it is more a question of faith?
Cheers,
Pete
Pete´s last blog ..peteboyr: @bullhunter Thanks, Sean. Just reviewing the webinar, and will get to your blogs after that. Big night ahead, pizza on the way!
Good morning Pete,
You raise a relevant point when you question ‘delusion’, for the truth is we are all creating illusions. A ‘delusion’ is someone’s opinion that something cannot be done – or that it doesn’t fit within that person’s understanding or comfort zones. We are all human, all born to a woman and whatever family status there is. We all grow – and we all have our own versions of what life is like, according to our perception. And perhaps that is why sisters and brothers all have common threads in their story and yet all have their own outcomes?
We have people saying the pyramid’s ‘can’t’ be built the way they are, I daresay there were those who told Alexander the Great he “couldn’t”; Martin Luther King and Gandhi were sniffed at – for how can a nation be changed? Napoleon Hill’s Edwin Barnes and Tony Robbins and many others looked at their lives and said to themselves – there IS more, and proceeded to just do it.
Our whole lives are just constructs, and if it is all just illusion, and it is all our life – then surely we are free to create our own reality. I know I’d rather choose good, wholesome and flourishing stuff to create, than the ‘other’.
Jo Carey-Bradshaw´s last blog ..Empowering Mindset – Obstacles or Pffffffft
Hey Sean,
Saying empowering comments is like positive affirmations, right? From what I’ve read over the years, the power of these self-statements comes not from the words, but from the belief behind the words. Otherwise wouldn’t it be a case of being on a fine line between being positive in outlook and being delusional? And how can you build that belief when your surrounds and current circumstances don’t reflect the ‘empowerment’ you are saying to yourself?
I don’t mean to bring down the tone and darken everyone’s positive vibe. I’m someone that is a ‘How do’ kind of fella. I like to know ‘how do’ you do it (or more so, ‘why do’ you do it) so that I have a better understanding of the application and the process. Or could that be part of my problem and that it is more a question of faith?
Cheers,
Pete
Oops, sorry about the duplication.
Pete´s last blog ..peteboyr: @bullhunter Thanks, Sean. Just reviewing the webinar, and will get to your blogs after that. Big night ahead, pizza on the way!
Hi Jo,
Well explained, I’m sure Pete will be happy with the understanding and your fine explanation. I enjoyed the read and wholeheartedly agree.
Thank-you, Jo
Jill Brown´s last blog ..Common Law Marriage – What is Common Law Marriage?
I must admit that I have always felt confident about myself and what I could do. As a result I always felt at ease assisting others and as a result ended up working as Senior Training Officer Informatics in Public Works Canada. I always tried to instill the same degree of confidence in my students no matter what esoteric computer subject I was training them in. And hopefully, a lot of them walked out of the classes feeling confidence in themselves and their ability to tackle any problems in their work environment.
Don White´s last blog ..You Cant Throw That Out-
Such an empowering post!
In days gone by i have heard so many people say “believe in yourself” when really what they probably should have been doing is telling me the actual things that they believed were positive about me & encouraging me to believe in those specifically positive things.
It’s great to be reminded how having an empowered identity makes a significant difference toward future success.