Mindset Mastery 176 – Influence of Opinion

There is a fine line between considering the opinions of others and letting them rule your life. Opinions of the periphery can very easily and quickly overtake you, and perpetuate that stagnation and procrastination in life that we talked about in the last Mindset Mastery post.

Easily Influenced

The majority of people who fail to accumulate money sufficient for their needs, are, generally, easily influenced by the “opinions” of others. They permit the newspapers and the “gossiping” neighbors to do their “thinking” for them. “Opinions are the cheapest commodities on earth. Everyone has a flock of opinions ready to be wished upon anyone who will accept them. If you are influenced by “opinions” when you reach decisions, you will not succeed in any undertaking, much less in that of transmuting your own desire into money.

If you are influenced by the opinions of others, you will have no desire of your own.

Keep Your Counsel

Keep your own counsel, when you begin to put into practice the principles described here, by reaching your own decisions and following them. Put confidence in no one except the members of your “Master Mind” group, and be very sure in your selection of this group, that you choose only those who will be in complete sympathy and harmony with your purpose.

Close friends and relatives, while not meaning to do so, often handicap a person through “opinions” and sometimes through ridicule, which is meant to be humorous. Thousands of men and women carry inferiority complexes with them all through life, because some well-meaning, but ignorant person destroyed their confidence through “opinions” or ridicule.

Use Your Personal Resources

You have a brain and a mind of your own. Use it, and reach your own decisions. If you need facts or information from other people to enable you to make decisions, and you probably will in many instances get the facts or secure the information you need quietly, without disclosing your purpose.

It is characteristic of people who have but a smattering or a veneer of knowledge to try to give the impression that they have a lot of knowledge. Such people generally do too much talking and too little listening. Keep your eyes and ears wide open—and your mouth closed, if you wish to acquire the habit of prompt decision. Those who talk too much do little else. If you talk more than you listen, you not only deprive yourself of many opportunities to accumulate useful knowledge, but you also disclose your plans and purposes to people who will take great enjoyment in defeating you, because they envy you.

And Remember…

Remember, also, that every time you open your mouth in the presence of a person who has an abundance of knowledge, you display to that person your exact stock of knowledge, or your lack of it! Genuine wisdom is usually conspicuous through modesty and silence.

Keep in mind the fact that every person with whom you associate is, like yourself, seeking the opportunity to accumulate money. If you talk about your plans too freely, you may be surprised when you learn that some other person has beaten you to your goal by putting into action before you the plans you unwisely talked about.

Let one of your first decisions be to keep a closed mouth and open ears and eyes.

As a reminder to yourself to follow this advice, it helps to write down the following quotation in large letters and place it where you will see it daily.

“Tell the world what you intend to do, but first show it.”

This is the equivalent of saying, “deeds, and not words, are what count most.”

Fundamental Life Lessons

Essentially what it comes down to is your ability to block out the noise that is inevitable and believe in yourself and the group that you have built as your advisors. As mentioned, it is not that outside contribution cannot be helpful, but only if carefully selected and evaluated. At the end of the day, even an action that may prove to be somewhat mistaken is an action that propels you toward your end goal, so you have to have some faith and confidence in your ability and decisions, and take the leap!

Again we can thank Napoleon Hill for his fantastic work.

Sean Rasmussen
Success Communicator
Aussie Internet Marketer © 2004 – 2010

About Sean Rasmussen

Sean Rasmussen is a passionate blogger and has been a full time internet marketer since 2005. When he's not with his family, or dog Buddy, Sean is usually blogging or doing something related to the internet.

Comments

  1. Opinions are everywhere. We are the only ones who can control our destiny. The choices we make must be our own if we want to live a fulfilled life because we know what is best for us.

    Since I chose to take care of my own destiny, my life has been so much more exciting and there’s so much to look forward to. Dream big and take action towards your goals… now I’m loving life and am so grateful for the everything I have.

    Thanks Sean for your amazing messages you share with us. 🙂
    .-= Ange Recchia´s last blog ..Jim Carrey on Thoughts and Intentions =-.

  2. Yes its true, opinions are everywhere, especially in the media these days. Its important to question the quality of the source of information before accepting it as true.

    Thanks Sean for share this with us
    .-= Cade´s last blog ..Trading Plan – Defining your Trade Exit Methods =-.

  3. Agree with both Ange and Cade.

    I believe it is human nature to look onto others who we perceive as having more knowledge or expertise and allow our own judgments and opinions to mimic theirs. This is not necessarily a bad thing as sometimes we all need some guidance and a starting path to reach our goals; however it’s where we get off somebody else’s path and start to follow our own that will truly dictate our lives.

    Love the line “Genuine wisdom is usually conspicuous through modesty and silence.” – May have to add this to my email sig if that’s OK with you Sean 😉
    .-= Cemil´s last blog ..Best Internet Marketing Plugins, Extensions and Tools using Firefox =-.

  4. There is a saying I picked up from a French movie the other night, “The smaller the dog, the more it barks”.

    As a life coach, I have a few clients that visit me whenever they have a problem. I guess they see me as part of their master mind group. Each of these clients is now doing exceedingly well in life. But it is a bit addictive to have a guru and I am now encouraging them to make decisions independent of me, and to their credit they are succeeding in that as well!

    But then I have clients who say ‘yes’ to taking action when they are with me but later fail to follow through. Guess what? It’s action that gets things done, not good intentions.
    .-= Wal Heinrich´s last blog ..Genetically Modified Foods – Are They Worth the Risk? =-.

    • I love the “small dog” quote Wal! It’s so true… how many “small dogs” do we all come across in our daily lives? Makes me certainly view these sort of people in a very different light as I often get frustrated with their loud bark that I just want to strangle them and tell them to shut-up… difficult when it’s a work situation!!

      I am more of the “silent type”.
      .-= Samantha Banfield´s last blog ..Sean Rasmussen and his crazy talk! =-.

  5. I agree with the suggestion to “keep a closed mouth and open ears and eyes”. Opinions are all around us and I think it’s important to hear them. But it’s equally important to act only on you own conclusion and not because someone else said you should.

    Everybody has to make up their own mind (and opinion) out of all the information (facts, rumors or otherwise) and decide what to do. If you just follow the opinion of someone else you can’t blame them if you end up somewhere you didn’t want to go – as you decided to go there without making sure it’s what you really wanted.
    .-= Renee´s last blog ..Secrets Of The Millionaire Mind by T Harv Eker – Book review =-.

  6. Hi Sean, I think from all your mindset mastery blogs this one (176) is the most beneficial to learn from – it’s probably the one I relate to the most due to past experiences. It’s easy to make mistakes and the ones mentioned here, when in the company of people the who are making mistakes.

    These days I am in the right company as a member of the YOTA forum – all the training is leading me to a positive mindset – I have trust I’m making right decisions – I have a new learning that is creating positive new habits.

  7. It is usually those that are least qualified to offer their opinions that are the most free in giving them which is why you need to block out the noise. Well written and a great lesson for all of us.
    .-= Lisa´s last blog ..Sign Language for Babies =-.

    • You are right Lisa. Why is it that so many people seem to think that they are qualified or indeed have a right to tell you what to do or try to influence you.

      I think it was Elenoar Roosevelt that said something like “You wouldn’t worry about what other people think about you if you knew how little they actually thought about you”. I take this to mean do your own thing and make your own decisions without fear of what opinion others may form about you.

  8. Hi Sean

    I think when you talk about the “fine line”, you’re right there. It’s about balance. To be good decision makers, we need to be able to listen to the opinion of others. The key is deciding on whose opinion counts, how much weight to give them and take on board what we think is right. It’s a mistake to take the attitude of, “I’m not listening to “negative” people or people who don’t know what they’re talking about…” That can be dangerous too. The fact is, we will hear people’s opinions whether we want to or not. Unless you choose to live in a cave. But it’s about making the right decisions for ourselves. People’s opinions – negative, positive, wrong or right, intelligent, unfounded, all have a purpose. They make us better decision makers… In my humble “opinion”.
    .-= Lina Nguyen´s last blog ..How to make comments online and build your online persona =-.

    • Ilse Aschenbrenner says:

      I agree with you Lina, not to hide from other people’s opinions. If you are sure in your own decision then other people’s negative opinions shouldn’t sway you. As long as we are aware that many people make opinions without much research into the subject and so perhaps more importantly we need to question as to how they came to form their opinion before we consider to perhaps take it as advice. I find negative talk makes me re-visit my decision and research a bit deeper into why and how I considered whatever I was considering. As long as you don’t give in to the first negative opinion that comes along.

  9. Hi Sean

    I think when you talk about the “fine line”, you’re right there. It’s about balance. To be good decision makers, we need to be able to listen to the opinion of others. The key is deciding on whose opinion counts, how much weight to give them and take on board what we think is right.

    It’s a mistake to take the attitude of, “I’m not listening to “negative” people or people who don’t know what they’re talking about…” That can be dangerous too. The fact is, we will hear people’s opinions whether we want to or not. Unless you choose to live in a cave. But it’s about making the right decisions for ourselves. People’s opinions – negative, positive, wrong or right, intelligent, unfounded, all have a purpose. They make us better decision makers… In my humble “opinion”.

    One thing I have to say I disagree with in your blog post – is when you say people have inferiority complexes because other people destroyed their confidence. No one can destroy your own confidence, except yourself.
    .-= Lina Nguyen´s last blog ..How to make comments online and build your online persona =-.

  10. Opinions do surround us… these days they smother us in the media. There is just so much of it on a non-stop basis.

    What happened to sharing ideas rather than forcing biased opinions onto people.

    What I loved about living in Japan was the cultural attitude of keeping “closed mouth and keeping your ears and eyes open” to listen and watch… appreciate others… appreciate their surroundings. There is much to learn just from this simple act. The trick is to have patience.
    .-= Samantha Banfield´s last blog ..Sean Rasmussen and his crazy talk! =-.

  11. I love this quote : “Tell the world what you intend to do, but first show it.”

    I have all great intentions with the raising of my son, planning to raise him with the knowledge of The Secret/ Law of Attraction and tremble at the thought of bringing him around those who not only doubt its effect but speak so negatively. Instead of “changing him” I’m consistently correcting myself in saying “change his diaper” and when he’s crying I still tell him how much I love him and let him know I realize he’s crying for a reason.

    When family says that he must be crying because life is so terrible or hard I always follow up with how great life is, how easy is will be for him and reassure him that he’ll be able to have everything he wants. My son is not even 4 months old but I realize now is the time to embrace it as he’s adapting habits before even able to speak.
    .-= Sarah Butland´s last blog ..My Book Review of Wondrous Strange by Leslie Livingston =-.

    • That is wonderfully positive Sarah. It is so easy for adults to impress their life experience on babies and children who are yet to form their own opinions. It just gives them something “extra” to “work” out – how confusing it must be for them.

      Especially babies, and what an excellent example you are to your son! Maybe a huge sign on the front door would help – “Leave your baggage at the door”
      .-= Samantha Banfield´s last blog ..Sean Rasmussen and his crazy talk! =-.

      • Thanks, Samantha. It’s certainly a struggle yet one I know is worth it. The sign would be great for my house but it’s the visits where things get completely out of control. It’s much easier to maintain and promote in my own environment than in others not to mention when he gets babysat.

        I discover the power of the Law of Attraction very late in life and often wonder where I’d be if I grown up with it. Like religion yet something easier to accept as it has more examples of instant gratification which is what the world has come to expect.

        It’s going to be a long adventure for my husband and me but when it’s something we believe so strongly to be true it’s more than worth it. If everyone adopted a similar perspective wouldn’t the world be so much more wonderful than it is now?
        .-= Sarah Butland´s last blog ..My Book Review of Wondrous Strange by Leslie Livingston =-.

  12. How true is that!!! We never tell our closet family what we are doing because 1. They do not “Get IT”. 2. They are too blind in their own world to see how we could succeed. 3. They can not be positive. 4. They will not support us in our goal. 5. They like to bring us down. 6. They are so unhappy that they like to make those around them unhappy.
    I like your advice to stop talking, and to listen. Sometimes we also need to stop from writing and just to read!!! Life is a journey of learing, and who to learn but from the best of the best…maybe some times are eyes and ears need to be opened more.
    Lisa
    .-= Lisa Wood´s last blog ..Its Meant To Be =-.

  13. Jazz Salinger says:

    Hi Sean,

    I’m not bothered by the opinions of others. If someone doesn’t pay my bills, then they don’t get a say in what I do. I will decide what is best for me and my partner is the only person I must answer to.

    I think that we have to expect that there will always be someone who doesn’t approve of what we’re doing. They’re entitled to their opinion but we don’t have to take it on board. I think if we believe strongly enough in what we are doing, their opinions will not hurt us.

    Besides, I love people who have negative things to say about me or what I’m trying to do. I take their negativity and use it to drive me to achieve more. 🙂

  14. “Essentially what it comes down to is your ability to block out the noise that is inevitable and believe in yourself and the group that you have built as your advisors.”

    How can one improve on this statement?? Believe in yourself – and block out the noise.
    .-= Jo Carey-Bradshaw´s last blog ..Empowering Mindset – Mindfulness =-.

  15. I agree with you Jazz that other peoples opinions some times don’t matter but it can bring you down or hurt you briefly.

    How I prefer to my live is with this quotation, not sure where it comes from;

    It is better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
    .-= Gee´s last blog ..Why You Should Just Ignore Fad Diets (Part 2) =-.

  16. Thanks for the reminder of this : If you are influenced by the opinions of others, you will have no desire of your own.

    I often find myself struggling to find the time to support others, to lend a hand to them and their cause while forgetting my own. Too often I hear negative gossip about people I don’t even know but friends and family have the need to tell me about how they feel about them. I try to end each conversation or put in the middle of each the question of “what do you like about them” so they at least take one moment to reflect on something good.
    .-= Sarah Butland´s last blog ..I Am Attracting You and Your Vote Via Law Of Attraction =-.

  17. Hi Sean,
    A favourite saying of mine is that “Actions speak louder than words” This has proven over time to be so true. People can say anything but it is what they do that really counts.

    I agree Sarah, that is a powerful quote: “Tell the world what you intend to do but show them first.” So wise.

    Thank-you Sean.
    .-= Jill Brown´s last blog ..Common Law Marriage – What is Common Law Marriage? =-.

    • Hi Jill,

      Yes, actions are the most important thing. People can and do say anything but it’s what they do that really defines who they are. If we are going to listen to the opinions of others, I think we need to consider their actions first.

      Because if they don’t walk the talk, they aren’t worth listening to. I think we need to spend less time talking about what we’re going to do and more time getting things done.
      .-= Jazz Salinger´s last blog ..Finding Your Passion =-.

  18. Hi Sean

    There is a vast difference between experience and opinion. It depends on where the person is coming from as to the validity.

    If someone gives you ‘advice’ simply and kindly ask “is this your opinion or your experience?” only if it is the latter, it may be worth listening to.

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